Think on These Things

Sorry, no pics again. I know ... blogger fail.

Well, I sit here and have pondered all morning. Events. Events of the past year, the past few months and weeks. Swirling thoughts and emotions (ooohhh the emotions of a pregnant lady!!) within me.

I have often been accused of being a sort of super woman. Many times someone will declare upon learning of our family's dynamic that they have no clue as to how I do it. Well, the truth is ... I don't.

There is nothing in me that is good. I struggle with the same sorts of struggles that everyone else does. That means that I have the same selfish desires, the same short fuses, the same grouchy moments and the same disorganized messes. In short - there is nothing special in me ... except Christ. He is the difference between me and giving in to those desires, fuses and grouchy moments. I don't always follow His prompting, and when that happens - well, it winds up being failure.

Why do I blog this?

For this reason:

Do I always feel like getting up in the morning and going through the day with the many snotty noses, eating regiments, and many many needs? Do I always feel like trusting God with my day, my choices, my children and the many other things I know I should? Do I always have the best of attitudes? Am I always the picture of positive thinking and optimistic approaches?

The resounding answer is ... NO. Period. Exclamation point. NO.

Today. Today has been rough. And it isn't even 11:30 am. My mind is swirling with thoughts, emotions run rampant in my heart. Babies are fussy from travelling this weekend. Little girls are testing the boundaries, and the boys are also worn out from travels, and I am feeling that "new pregnant" sick. Really, today isn't any different than many other days I have had recently-or have experienced prior. I really think that it is my outlook that is different. My reaction to those thoughts and emotions swirling. I'm letting them grip me. Not good.

The truth is - I have a choice. I can choose to allow myself to be gripped and pulled down - or I can choose to find the sweetness in my day, to push past those things I could dwell on - and grab ahold of those things that Christ would have me meditate upon.

phillipians 4:8

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

1. whatsoever things are true: my family is healthy, my coffeepot is full, and my Lord reigns

2. whatsoever things are just: God's word in my life is always true, and always right - I can lean on that and know it will direct my path

3.whatsoever things are pure: I know the promises God has laid before me regarding the choices in my life - and I know those are pure and hold promises for me and my family.

4. whatsoever things are lovely: my children. My husband. My Saviour. All are lovely to me.

5. whatsoever things are of good report: Missionary friends seeing souls come to Christ, Ivanna's heart being well, Churches starting, and the gospel being preached.

6. If there be any virtue, if there be any praise ... think on these things.

Thank you Lord. I will.

Those thoughts that don't fall into the realm of this verse, do me no good. It's time to put those aside and "think on these things".

So. Do you see? I am no super woman. I am not some sort of marvel in motherhood. I struggle. I fail.

But ... Christ does not. Since He reigns within my heart - He is the difference in days like this. In my best moments - it's Him you see. Not me.

Sometimes blogging isn't just for those reading - sometimes it's selfish. Typing this out, I can feel my perspective changing already...